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Feel the Fear and Do it Anyway

When you have a goal in mind, when you want more for yourself, you make the decision to create change. There will always be a voice that tries to stop you.

It might say,

What will people say?

What will people think?

No one will support me.

My friends/family will think I’m an idiot.

I haven’t got time.

I don’t know where to start.

I feel uncomfortable.

A lot of things will come up that will try to stop you changing.

You might decide to go along and start anyway.

You gain momentum, make a decision and go for it.

And something doesn’t go to plan.

You get sick.

Your kids get sick.

Your day job gets busy.

You didn’t sleep well last night.

You have a wedding/party/event to go to.

Your routine, momentum slows down or halts.

Then you’re stuck.

The voice starts again.

You’re a failure.

You said you would do that and you didn’t.

Everyone else is now further ahead of me.

If I start now they’ll know I didn’t show up and think I’m a failure.

I can’t do this.

I’m scared.

I’m embarrassed. I don’t deserve a new life. I don’t deserve success.

My mother always told me…,

Blah blah blah

And then it’s a year later.

Two years later. Five.

And you are still in the same place.

But you’re feeling worse because you started something, it didn’t work out so now you’re really stuck and afraid.

It doesn’t have to be like that.

The way to start again is just decide you want it.

Recognise the fear, the voice telling you not to for what it is – a bully.

A bully who is scared to let you shine. Who is jealous of your light.

Make small changes.

Get out of bed a little earlier.

Have one less coffee.

Make one phone call.

Spend 30 minutes planning the assignment, and do one thing of action.

Be more present today.

Recognise the negative thought and flip it to a positive one.

What would your best friend say?

Be your best friend.

Be your own cheering squad.

Light your path and each day take a step further.

There will be days you take a few steps back. That’s ok.

As long as the next day you pick yourself up and continue to move forward.

You can do this.

If you feel like you would like assistance to move past the place you are currently stuck at, please consider life coaching.

I have 1:1 coaching packages with two options. A 1 session mentor session, and a 3 month coaching package (currently on sale for 30% off). Contact me for more details.

Do you journal?

When I was young I had a diary. Each entry always started with “Dear Diary…”

You know it wasn’t until recently this memory from my childhood resurfaced and as I thought more about it I realised the power that diary had.

As an adult I journal, not every day, sometimes not for weeks. But when I’m out of sorts, lost, losing touch with myself and my path the first thing I do is grab out my journal.

By the time I’m finished writing I’m clearer and lighter.

It’s the first tool I recommend to all my coaching clients.

The power of a diary or journal is to allow us space.
Space from our thoughts.
A safe space that no other person needs to be privy to.
Space in our minds and hearts created by getting the words that are circling around causing anxiety to be released.

Truly so powerful. And so when I think back to when I was 8 when I was gifted my first diary (with a key and all!) and the ritual I had of writing in it and those that followed over my teen years and beyond, I am grateful.

Grateful I had that space, that tool to fall on, without even knowing I was being guided back to me.

Trusting myself to sort out my own thoughts and feelings. The power of that, right?

We are our own best support system.
We must trust that, and allow the space for our own intuition and guidance to be heard.

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Why I love my collaborative business

I have been in business in one form or another for most of my adult life. I love it. I love being the captain of my own ship, so to speak.

When I owned by beauty and nail business, it was all on me. Everything implemented was on me. Answering to massive overheads and the stress that can at times come with staff, having to be available at set hours, many times missing out on school events and times when my son was sick having the stress of knowing if I didn’t go to work I might not be able to meet all the financial requirements I had for the business, let alone rescheduling clients and then having to work overtime to fit them back in. It was exhausting!!

That mainstream model of business is what we are often taught to believe is the only way to operate. Network marketing has been given a stigma due to unethical companies and practises. Having now experienced both models, I can whole-heartedly, hand on my heart say network marketing is the way forward. It is supportive, community oriented and at the end of the day it is something we all do without even realising it.

When I purchase a product I really love and have outstanding results from, or receive great service from a business, I tell everyone I know. I recommend it over and over.

This is what network marketing is. The bonus is we receive financial compensation for our recommendation – ongoing. We aren’t out to promote a product just for the pure aim of making a dollar – or at least I definitely am not.

Making money is an important way of life and nothing to be ashamed of, however I only recommend my products to people when I see they have a genuine need for it and I feel it may benefit them. I would only ever align myself with a product and company I believe in, that I believe offers incredible results, and I will only recommend those products and company based on that premise, not just to my friends and family, but to everyone.

It has been through building my network marketing business with dōTERRA that I have found a beautiful community of like-minded people to grow with and support each other on our wellness journeys.

A tribe of people who want to be a part of something bigger, who believe together we rise.

A community that believes in being empowered to rock the status quo and seek natural and low toxin solutions for the health and wellbeing of ourselves and our families.

My business is comprised of 95% wholesale customers of whom I support and educate, and a small handful of people building their own business whom I lead and mentor.

I have discovered earning an income can be fun, but also the support of a residual income in times when I would not have been able to go to a day job is priceless.

  • I don’t have the same stresses I mentioned before that I had in my past business.
  • My overheads each month are incredibly low.
  • My time is flexible and fits easily around my family and other commitments.
  • I work from home.
  • The residual income offers support for me to pursue my other passions with ease.
  • Many of the systems and strategies have already been put together for me, and have been tried and tested for success.
  • The network marketing model is one that offers endless opportunities other industries just do not and can not offer.

Just like anything, it may not be for everyone.

You must be dedicated, prepared to do the work required including a commitment to personal development, be coachable, a good communicator, a team player, hold a positive and abundant mindset, be goal-oriented and self-motivated.

My team are currently from all over Australia, my wider team from all over the world. We meet in person a few times a year, and regularly via video online, over the phone and in our private groups. We are from all walks of life – parents, nurses, counsellors, life coaches, holistic therapists, corporate, and more – all lifting and supporting each other to reach our goals individually and collectively. I am eternally grateful this business has connected me with them all, they are a beautiful group of people.

If this has peaked your interest and you would like to learn more check out this page or contact me for an obligation free chat, we always have room for you in our team.

Eric Worre Interviews Sir Richard Branson on Network Marketing

Tony Robbins on Network Marketing

Stepping out despite social anxiety

I’ve felt awkward in almost all situations I’ve been in my whole life. Like I don’t fit in, like I’m just not quite the same as the people I’m with, and that because of that I feel like people don’t quite like me.

It’s a feeling possibly best described as misfiring, as in I’m present but that no one quite SEES ME. 

This has held me back in so many ways.

I’ve used drugs and alcohol at different stages of my life to mask the uncomfortableness and give me some sort of courage, alter ego even.

I’ve stayed in terrible relationships for far too long for fear of being alone, until staying is just too unbearable. 

I’ve hidden behind my son at many, many functions, to not be exposed.

I’ve used my job as a barrier between me and my client to avoid exposing my insecurities. 

I’ve cancelled going to many events last minute because the anxiety of going was too much to bare. 

Going to an event alone means summoning courage from deep down, going means knowing deep within my soul that I have to be there, and then I feel awkward as hell.

Most people probably don’t know any of this about me. Just like many people who live with social anxiety, I’ve become pretty good at being aloof, faking it so you can’t see the anxiousness under my facade. 

Stepping out into the social media world and building an online business is the hardest thing I’ve ever done.

I have nothing to hide behind (ok well there’s my computer & product) but what this platform requires of me is to show you ME.

Authenticity, integrity, truth, honesty, being real are traits I hold of most importance and so I felt to share this with you so you may see a bit of what’s under my posts, and I hope it can give some of you who feel this too the chance to exhale and know you are not alone.

The above is a post I shared to my social media channels yesterday. The responses I have received have been beautiful. So many women, some I have known personally, some I do not know have shared they also feel the same way.

IMG_6849I read a quote a friend shared on Instagram recently by Glennon Doyle which I felt was a beautiful reminder of how cliquey women can be, but it made me think it’s not usually about exclusion which our default may have us believe, but more I feel it is about the fear of ourselves stepping out of our comfort zone to reach to someone we don’t know.

Perhaps there is an awe, an intimidation even, of seeing a woman attending an event alone that we feel she is strong and confident and not a match for us while we are attempting to hold our mask firmly so it may not slip and show how fragile we really are underneath.

I’ve been that woman at an event alone, trying to blend and not be too obviously on my own. What I’ve noticed in those situations is often the lack of eye contact, or the looks up and down, or the small gesture of a smile as they turn away. As an introvert, it has taken all my strength at times to not just walk out, but instead to take a deep breath in and out, readjust my mask of confidence and stand strong.

Approaching a group or another person who is alone can summon up a lot of courage, there’s a whole lot of inner conversation going on – a battle between my mind of reason and my mind of fear. It is sheer determination and will that sees reason win… mostly.

As I’ve gotten older and the personal development study I have soaked in has grown, I have learned that other people’s reactions to you are a direct indication of where they are at with themselves, and that often – if we allow ourselves to go there – can be a mirror of how WE feel about ourselves. As we begin to love ourselves as our best friend and really do the work to dispel the negative thoughts and chatter going on in our minds these situations lessen, our confidence grows, or at least our thoughts no longer have the power to control us and hold us back.

So, and this is advice I am giving myself… do that thing you want to do, even if it means going alone; say hello to the woman on her own and include her in your circle – at any given moment you could be her; consciously and actively switch the language you are using with yourself to be what you would say to your best friend; and most importantly love yourself – for you are unique, you are beautiful, and you are not alone.

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10 books I recommend for a self confidence boost:

  • Mastering Your Mean Girl, Melissa Ambrosini
  • You Do You, Sarah Knight
  • The Power of Now, Eckhart Tolle
  • Daring Greatly, Brené Brown
  • Rise Sister Rise, Rebecca Campbell
  • A Return to Love, Marianne Williamson
  • You are Enough, Cassie Mendoza-Jones
  • Big Magic, Elizabeth Gilbert
  • Judgment Detox, Gabrielle Bernstein
  • Conversations with God, Neale Donald Walsh

Using Essential Oils for Emotional Support

Essential oils are a powerful tool for emotional support. Aroma has long been revered for its ability to bring forth memories, both positive and negative, therefore using essential oils for emotional support must be approached with care.

We all have unresolved feelings of hurt from past experiences. It is by bringing them to the surface we can be offered the opportunity to resolve them, let go and move forward with our lives. Essential oils set the foundation for us to work with our emotions, from there it is up to us to do the personal development – the emotional and mental work required, to move past the issues.

According to Enlighten Healing in their book Emotions & Essential Oils: A Modern Resource for Healing, there are five stages of healing. Essential oils may be used to support this process. An example used is that as we regain our physical health, we may then begin to heal our emotional health and so on through the five stages.

The Five Stages are:

  1. Essential oils assist in healing the physical body.
  2. Essential oils assist in healing the heart.
  3. Essential oils assist in releasing limiting beliefs.
  4. Essential oils increase spiritual awareness and connection.
  5. Essential oils inspire the fulfillment of our life’s purpose.

– Enlighten Healing, Emotions & Essential Oils: A Modern Resource for Healing (Fall 2016 ed.)

I personally have used essential oils to support my emotional state in many situations. I first began using essential oils (Bergamot and Ylang Ylang) when weaning myself off antidepressants.

I have used blends that include oils such as Bergamot, Juniper Berry, Myrrh, Arborvitae, Thyme and other oils to support me in moments of feeling deep heartbreak, feeling let down, abandoned and wronged.

I also use essential oils to uplift me. Citrus oils are perfect for that with some of my favourite being Wild Orange, Lemon and Tangerine.

HOW TO PURCHASE doTERRA ESSENTIAL OILS

The doTERRA Emotional Aromatherapy range and the Mood Management kit are some of my favourite oil blends for managing emotions. They are carefully selected blends designed to support particular emotions such as, doTERRA Cheer, doTERRA Forgive, doTERRA Console, doTERRA Balance, doTERRA Citrus Bliss, doTERRA Elevation and doTERRA Serenity, just to name a few. What I love about these blends is it takes the thinking out of what oils you are going to use to support a particular emotion.

However, more often I tend to work with essential oils quite intuitively. I believe once you start using essential oils, particularly high purity, and high vibrational oils such as doTERRA essential oils our intuition becomes heightened and our bodies/minds ‘just know’ which oils are required at any given time.

I often will choose a few oils from my collection to use in my diffuser and after I will look up the emotional aspects and meanings in my Enlighten Healing book and be blown away by the accuracy of the oils I have chosen for what I am experiencing at that time.

How to use essential oils for emotional support

Essential oils are most effectively used for supporting emotions by using aromatically and topically.

Aromatically

View More: http://inkandivory.pass.us/casandrasmithUsing a diffuser is an effective way to create a positive atmosphere in your home that supports the whole household by dispersing the oils into the air.

By using calming oils, such as lavender, you can create a relaxing and soothing environment, perfect when anxious feelings are rising or to prepare to wind down for rest or sleep. Using uplifting oils, such as a combination of peppermint and wild orange is great to elevate and motivate you.

Inhaling essential oils either directly from the bottle or applying a drop or two to your palms, rubbing together and inhaling from cupped hands is a fast way to affect your mood. This method very quickly impacts the olfactory system and reaches the brain particularly the amygdala and limbic areas where emotions and memories are stored.

Topically

Essential oils are potent, particularly pure, high quality oils from doTERRA and should be treated with respect. It is therefore important to always protect the skin from possible sensitivity by diluting with a carrier oil. I prefer fractionated coconut oil for its ability to absorb easily into the skin without leaving a residue and also as it has almost no aroma.

To use essential oils topically you may create an aromatic dressing by putting a few drops of your chosen essential oil in a dressing bowl with a carrier oil (see dilution ratios below) and massaging the blend over your body.

Making your own rollerball blend is an effective way to use essential oils topically and making your blend last for longer. Add the chosen essential oils to the bottle, top with the carrier oil and you’re ready to go. Making your own ‘purefume’ is a perfect alternative to using synthetic perfumes and can be taken with you wherever you go to be reapplied every few hours.

A general rule of dilution

Adults: 5 drops (in total) essential oil to 10ml carrier oil

Children (half adult ratio): 3 drops (in total) essential oils to 10ml carrier oil

Babies: 1 drop essential oil to 10ml carrier oil
There are many essential oils inappropriate to use with babies, please diligently do your research before applying essential oils topically to babies.

If you are sensitive or using potent oils like oregano, clove or cinnamon you may need to dilute further. Avoid using essential oils in your eyes, nasal cavity, and in your ears. If you have a reaction or to an oil or the oil blend is too strong, dilute with carrier oil or milk to the area, not water.

Essential oils best known for the emotional support they offer

10 Essential Oils for Emotional support infographic

PURCHASE doTERRA ESSENTIAL OILS

Learn more about essential oils via my blog post

Attend one of my Australian Essential Oil Classes

Join my team and start earning yourself a residual income today
Book a free chat with me now!

Expansion

It all started with a vision in Shavasana at my local Yoga class.

This guy appeared in my mind, the clearest image I’ve ever seen, as though I had seen him before and the name Tom came to me.

 

It all started with a vision in Shavasana at my local Yoga class.

This guy appeared in my mind, the clearest image I’ve ever seen, as though I had seen him before and the name Tom came to me.

My shavasanas, meditations rarely give me images, or signs, usually there is just calm and back then it was usually creating a to-do list, reminiscing about stupid crap, ready to move onto to the next thing.

The class ended, I walked out and grabbed the latest copy of Holistic Bliss magazine. When I got home I looked at the cover, there looking back at me was Tom Cronin, founder of the Stillness Project and the man hanging out in my vision. This moment was when life as I’d been floating along with changed. I knew I had to, that I would, meet him.

6 months later I saw him speak at an event, another 6 months later I was on his retreat.

In fact exactly 12 months since I had the vision, I was on the retreat.

By that stage I had enrolled with the Beautiful You Coaching Academy, completed my first year at University, change was happening fairly unconsciously.

So many things changed within me on that retreat, at the end of 2016. These things began the catalyst for my 2017 – a year of Expansion.

“We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us”

– Joseph Campbell

This year I completed my training with Beautiful You Coaching Academy (Read more about that here), continued my university studies for a Bachelor of Counselling and began my business with doTERRA. I felt deep hurt when one of my closest friends crossed a line very important to me, I felt the uncomfortable growing pains that comes with being in a network marketing business, and I put myself in situations that are way outside of the comfort zone of this little introverted empath.

I discovered how important boundaries are for survival. I learnt how much beauty there is in a desire to serve. I learnt that flicking your mindset has the power to change your trajectory in an instant.

I learnt I am not alone, I am loved and supported and when you think you are alone and no one gets you, all it takes is a leap of faith and the universe will throw you head first into a crowd of souls that are YOUR people.

2017 hasn’t been all roses, but being able to see the beauty in the pains, the stretching and having the ability to look behind and be grateful is priceless.

I am no longer the same person I was on 30th December, 2016. And I am just so so excited to see who I am on 30th December 2018.

Much love,

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Leaving it until the last minute

On Friday night I was up until 2am finishing an assignment for uni that was due at midnight.

I was frantically trying to get it done all the while kicking myself for not starting it until Wednesday. 

What’s worse was it was a journal assignment. All I’d had to do was write 350 words on a set reading each week. 

But I didn’t do the readings. 

View More: http://inkandivory.pass.us/casandrasmithI had ‘many other’ things to do that albeit were necessary and important, and they were also far more creative and enjoyable than reading a 20-40+ page academic article and then critically evaluating it.

So there I am internalising my self-hate at my lack of organisation, motivation and mountain of procrastination that got me in that position on a Friday night, and I have all these beautiful comments going through my head from people saying to me,

“you are amazing, you are doing so much, you are so inspiring”
and I’m feeling like a fraud. 

In these moments of praise I even find myself saying to people

“I’ve got a lot of commitments but I’m not really doing any of it well”. 

You see what I’ve realised is this situation is like trying to get my son to eat veges.

  • He likes to eat the meat, or the thing he likes on the plate first.
  • Then he’s left with the cold, unappetising veges.
  • No matter how many years I’ve asked him to eat the veges first, they are so much nicer warm… he refuses and dinner ends in tears – both of us in tears! 

What I recognised is this is Me!! I’d decided that assignments were hard and boring, and sometimes they are, so I set myself up to avoid them to only feel the pain later. Stubborn much?!

I teach people to take baby steps toward change. Keep your WHY in front of you to help motivate you, and with every other thing I do I’ve done this, but with uni I hadn’t.

When you know your WHY- your reason for why you’re doing something – your light at the end of the tunnel, you are far more motivated to dig in the trenches to get there.

The basis of my WHY for completing my degree is I want to help people to free themselves from their limitations to create a life of freedom– it’s the same for all I’m doing- life coaching, essential oils and business mentoring. With uni it’s about having more developed skills and training to assist on a deeper level and the recognition of having that training.

Not all the actions that are required of you to realise your dream are fun, or creative, or exciting; some of it is boring or challenging, but all the pieces are equally important and have valuable lessons to give you along the way. 

My next assignment is due in a few weeks. My plan of action is to do an hour a day on it everyday to get it finished, on time or before. 

My short-term reward is uni holidays start beginning of November for four months… I’ll have all the time to do the fun stuff then! 

Is there something you’ve been putting off starting for all your own reasons?

Don’t want to, it’ll be hard, got other things to do?

Maybe reading this will help you know you aren’t alone, and give you a little push to take action- remember any action is a step forward and closer to your goal.

Much love,

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You don't have to see the whole staircase.Just take the first step.